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 Last year X-Expats interviewed Alan Paul, American Expat/Repat, Writer (Wall Street Journal, Guitar World and Slam Magazines), Blogger, and Musician to discuss his overseas experience. Since returning from China, Alan has worked on numerous projects including turning his cross-cultural experience into a memoir. We are very grateful that Alan took time out of his hectic schedule to answer our questions following the release of his book “Big in China, my unlikely adventures raising a family, playing the blues, and becoming a star in Beijing”.
X-Expats: What prompted you to write “Big in China”?
Alan Paul: I used to say that I would have written the book even if I hadn’t gotten a deal but now that I know how much work was involved, I can’t really say that. I would have wanted to write something but would have been less ambitious. It was a wonderful opportunity to reflect on all my experiences in China, synthesize them and try to understand just what had happened.
But, as interesting as a lot of my experiences were, I wanted the book to be bigger than that, not just a recitation of “I did this then I did this…” I wanted to synthesize it all and make it something bigger than me – make it about what it takes to have a healthy, happy long-term marriage, where both partners support one another and don’t stifle their individual ambitions. About how having children can be an enhancer of excitement rather than just the inhibitor so many take it to be, And about how great things can happen to anyone anywhere in the world if they have their eyes and ears open and are willing to take some chances.
X-E: Is this a “self- help” guide for expats and trailing spouses?
AP: Sort of. Some people, including one genius marketer of a friend, suggested I actually write the book as a guide. But I don’t read self-help guides so I didn’t want to write one. I wanted it to be a narrative with established characters, momentum, movement, passion -literature, in short. But I do think that the end result is a sort of guide to how to have a happy expat life, whether or not you are a trailing spouse: embrace the place you live; communicate with your spouse; share the joys; have fun; make great expat friends while also casting a wider net and being a part of your wider community. And do not treat your new home exactly like your old. You are in a different place. Embrace it and enjoy it.
X-E: The format of your book is quite interesting. You associated tunes with chapters of your life. Why these references?
AP: The chapter titles are all song titles, mostly songs that have meant a lot to me, though in some cases just ones that fit. After I turned my first draft in, I was discussing it with my editor and we agreed that there were some that were too sprawly. She said, “You really need to think what each chapter is about and keep them focused” and suggested titles as a means of helping me do that. I thought it was a great idea and just naturally started trying to come up with song titles that worked because that’s how I think.
X-E: In your memoir you describe and reflect on your transformative journey, “the expat life” in a booming city, Chinese culture today and of course the relationships you developed while in Beijing. How did the people around you react when you mentioned your writing project?
AP: When I was living this thing, I mostly did not know I was writing a book. I did, however, write The Expat Life column for three and a half years and found that people were sometimes guarded around me for fear of ending up in a column. I reassured them with the truth: I never write about anyone without discussing it with them and I wouldn’t use anything they are not comfortable with. A lot of my friends from Beijing have thanked me for writing this because I captured a slice of their life. They can show it to people, including parents, siblings, dear friends, who have struggled to understand their China experiences. I hope other expats will feel the same way and want to share it. I think I captured something real that many of us experience living overseas. Even if your experiences were very different from mine, certain feelings and emotions and relationships will resonate.
X-E: A number of Chinese nationals you befriended had international exposure and/or lived in foreign countries. Do you believe that this shared characteristic played a role in your ability to connect and exploit each other’s untapped potential?
AP: That’s an interesting question and something I honestly have not thought about. You are referring primarily to my band partner Woodie Wu, who spent three years in Australia, and my Chinese teacher Yechen, who taught in London for 5 years. I would have to say yes. Thank you for making me think about that.
X-E: Throughout your book, we discover the power of curiosity, enthusiasm, and openness. Was attitude key in turning challenges and opportunities into success and happiness?
AP: Of course! It always is. You can’t sit around and cry in your beer. You have to get up, get out and make things happen. I was also very fortunate in many ways, but being open to meeting new people and dealing with them on their own terms without false expectations, was key. I like the phrase “the power of curiosity.” Thanks again.
X-E: It’s been 2 years since you returned from this foreign assignment. How is the “repat life”
AP: It’s ok. Really, it’s ok. I miss a lot of things, but this book was like a lifeline. It was like being paid for my therapy. It allowed me to come to terms with everything I went through in China, process it, put it behind me - and hopefully turn it into a great piece of art.
X-E: What’s next? Do you plan to tour with your band in the US or abroad? More writing projects?
AP: I am writer so I will write. I am singer so I will sing. I am a winger so I will wing it. All of which is a cute way of saying I really don’t know. I honestly think I have gotten pretty far by winging it and have learned not to fear the dead ends, which hopefully prove to be temporary. I have a lot of stories left to tell. I would like to dig in to something not so intimately about me next. It is still hard for me to digest but I just signed a deal to option Big In China movie rights to Montecito Pictures, the production company that did Up in the Air, among other movies. The principal there is Ivan Reitman (Ghostbusters) and he is interested in possibly directing the movie himself. There are many, many steps between this and a movie actually being made, but it is, of course, a big leap and it's thrilling, dizzying and more than a little unnerving. One of these days I'll be able to process it and figure out how it feels, but for now I'll just keep trying to ride the wave.
As I quoted B.B. King in the book, discussing my China experiences, "You better not look down if you want to keep on flying." I would very much like to bring the band to the US for a tour and tried to do so for the book launch but could not get them visas. Maybe I’ll get them here for the movie premiere. Then everything will have come full circle and I can move on and start something new.
X-E: Thank you very much Alan for taking the time to answer our questions and sharing what you learned from this international experience and cross-cultural exposure. To read excerpts from Alan's memoir or order his book, please visit his website.
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